Sweden can teach us a lot about successful parenting

The Swedish way of parenting is a fascinating mix of pragmatism, globalism and stoicism.

I’m currently spending time in Sweden with my son and his family. I’m struck by how differently children are raised here. than they are in Australia and other English speaking countries.

This is my sixth trip in six years so I’ve had a chance to check out the culture, the education scene and the way kids are raised.

Many factors impact parenting including climate, geography, family size, housing and politics.

Most Swedes have adapted well to any limitations placed on them by say, climate or geography and make the most of their advantages.

Here are five Swedish parenting strengths that have emerged in my time here.

1. Swedish kids spend a lot of time outdoors

Walk through any city or town mid week and you’ll see young children in coloured vests in parks, shopping centres or huddled together in Cargo bikes, with an adult madly pedalling away.

Summer or winter, it doesn’t matter. Kids will be outside whether on a child care excursion, a school trip or after school play.

They dress for the weather. In winter, layer upon layer of clothing is under an outer coat, water proof and beanie. In summer, the choices are endless.

There’s a sense of stoicism in the Swedish approach to their harsh climate. Their kids are expected to embrace the cold rather than hide away at home when the weather is a tad chilly, wet or windy.

Methinks we could learn a lot in my country from this stoic attitude toward the elements.

2. Swedish families embed mental health practices into every day life

Swedish people have many what we now consider preventive mental health practices. The most ubiquitous is their use of saunas.

Communal saunas are a huge part of Swedish culture. This is different from other countries such as Finland where saunas are a more private affair.

A visit to a Swedish sauna is a communal affair. They go in groups or meet up with friends at the local sauna.

There can be so much chatter in a sauna that it’s common to set one aside for people who like to sweat in silence.

I love the fact that Swedes combine the physical benefits of saunas with the social and mental health benefits of community.

Mental health practices such as saunas, mindfulness, exercise and play are integral to family life in most parts of Sweden.

3. After school activities are linked to enjoyment, not success

If there’s one Swedish feature I’d love to introduce into Australia (and other English-speaking countries) it’s their emphasis on developing hobbies and nurturing interests in children and young people that add to their wellbeing and quality of life. In my neck of the woods we still tend to opt for after school activities for educational reasons or that have a success outcome.

Crafts, music, sport and other hobbies are heavily subsidised by the central government in Sweden so there are no financial barriers to involvement.

For instance, ice skates and skating lessons are free for kids in my son’s home town of Malmö so skating is on the agenda for everyone.

Yep, there’s a theme here- outdoors activities, mental health focus and community are at the heart of Swedish family-life.

4. Swedish kids live locally, but think globally

You’d think that growing up in a sparsely populated country, speaking a language shared by no other nationality would lead to insularity and inwardness.

Quite the contrary.

Swedish kids have a sophistication and confidence that’s born from the fact that they all speak a second language (English). A good number have a third language(German), while many understand a fourth language - Danish- as Denmark is just across the Oresund Strait.

Swedes are taught from a young age that they may work in Germany, Denmark, England or elsewhere so they best adapt, and look at the world beyond their borders.

5. Swedish kids matter

The science of ‘mattering’ has fascinated me for some time. Mattering relates to how a group or society values another group and how that group can add value. In this case mattering refers to how society values children and how kids can add value to society.

My sense is that kids are expected to do much more in Sweden than those in my country. They are expected to help at home, volunteer at school and help out at community events.

Certainly, Swedish society values kids far more than many countries I’ve visited and lived in. It is a child-friendly country to visit with so many attractions open to kids.

But more importantly, Sweden has a plethora of rituals and traditions aimed squarely at younger generations.

Okay, there’s Halloween and Christmas but they have so many more traditions and gatherings that link children to their communities and help them understand their past.

Swedes would tell me to keep my feet on the ground

It’s dangerous to generalise and easy to get carried away with a point of view.

I’m not suggesting that Sweden is the parenting promised land.

Nope, it’s hard work here and parents (and teachers) have their problems as they do in other countries

But there are some fascinating parenting patterns here that parents in other countries could do well to adopt, or at least consider.

Swedes are remarkably pragmatic and renowned for keeping their feet on the ground. They certainly don’t put kids on pedestals. They expect a lot behaviour, resilience and contribution-wise.

While Swedish people are generally polite, rule followers, they are adept at raising confident, resilient kids who are likely to see their place in a world beyond their borders.

In these interesting, nationalistic times that is parenting gold.